20 years...summed up!

“LIVE EVERYDAY AS YOUR LAST BECAUSE ONE OF THESE DAYS, IT WILL BE!”

-          LIFE OR SOMETHING LIKE IT.

The movie “Life or Something Like It” truly didn’t have anything out of the box to offer but, it did succeed in attracting positive energy towards my otherwise negatively mundane and awkwardly silent evening. Nevertheless, the movie motivated me towards writing this post. This write up is absolutely a random one and I do not find anything negative about it because I do not find any reason in running away from something that is bound to happen.

‘Nobody is Immortal’ and death will find you some day for sure. You cannot escape death; neither can you hide from death, when it paves its majestic way into your life.

After living for almost a score of years, when I retrospect now, I see vivid moments of uncontrollable laughter – I must say those incessant giggles did earn me a commendable share of troubles too, but who cares?!? At the end, I was just consuming the best medicine, isn't it? I never forget… "LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE”. Along with those heehaws, there are tears too, caused by immense grief, sadness and guilt. There are times when I have been unethical and there have been instances when I have diligently followed the rules, no matter what. There have been days brighter than sapphire and even too many hours darker than pitch black. I have often been regarded as the most cheerful person around; while on many occasions, I have pretended to be the strong person who I was not. So, there’s already a huge bag full of memorable experiences and there will be too many more I hope.

But, why am I writing this post?

Ah! After watching the movie when I came across this hilarious epitaph co-incidentally in some random Facebook album, I thought what if my last breath arrives sooner than I expect it to knock and that too without any prior notice? Obviously I will not be able to bury my head in the sand then but why not prepare an Epitaph beforehand only? Now, generally an epitaph is a simple quotation on any gravestone for the person’s soul residing inside the grave. But, I will never be able to sum up my life in just one statement; maybe others will be able to. So, my epitaph will be directly proportional to the amount I talk.

Hence, instead of just one line, here are a few lines that I would love to see on my Epitaph:

“You will be eternally remembered for your love that was limitless; smile that was constant; laughter that was contagious; talks that were endless; arguments that were baseless; acts that were hilariously careless; silence that was never heard; memory that was incredibly sharp; jokes that were terribly lame; hurts that were dejectedly irreversible; madness that was beyond comparison and nevertheless the shrill and distinct pitch which was never inaudible.”

Now, this I guess sums up my life perfectly as of now. Ten years ahead, there may be some additions or subtractions. Who knows? Because in any case, I cannot predict the future, can I?

P.S: The word ‘eternally’ is extremely essential for my epitaph. After all, I doubt there is anybody who wishes not to be ever remembered and I am not an exception.

The Voyage to ‘Beyond’ and back…

“Imagine there’s no country,

It isn’t hard to do.

Nothing to kill or die for,

And no religion too.”

                 -John Lennon.

These were mere four lines for everybody during one of the class twelve English lectures, excluding me. I came across these lines while reading the short story in our English textbook, “My Family and Globalisers”. The whole class moved on to the next lines while my mind stayed there and for the first time, I felt like listening to John Lennon. There was something extraordinarily intriguing in these lines which got me seriously hooked onto this song.  As soon as I returned home, I created a real mess as I frantically started searching all my CD collections to get hold of the Beatles discography. My cousin had long back gifted it to me but, I seriously never felt like listening to it. Alas! I deduced after going through the song list that it was a John Lennon single after there was a split in the Beatles. 

For the next few days, it was the sound of “IMAGINE!” that echoed throughout the day in my house and in my mind too. Songs written for a cause or with a story behind the lyrics always fascinates me and “Imagine” was not an exception. The image of Utopia which embodies the lines simply intensified my curiosity and google.com indeed comes handy at such times. The search results were countless but one thing was for sure…. Lennon and his ideals had made a permanent impression on my mind, or at least I thought so. The more I read about him, his songs, the causes he fought for, the demonstrations he conducted, which were nowhere even remotely close to violence made me admire him more. More than Lennon, I fell in love with the America of the 70s and truly wished that I would belong to that generation and join the mass protests that surrounded the Vietnam War. “Imagine !” was the key that opened the doors to the world that out and out enthralled me. I became more and more passionate with every passing day to know more about the political scenario then and the protests that took place. 

Going through the music videos of politically inclined songs like 'Imagine', 'Power to the People', 'Gimme Some Truth', 'Give Peace A Chance' on youtube, I noticed that it was the youth and the psychedelic strata of the counterculture, popularly known as the Hippies who played an active role in the protests. Somehow, I loved the way the Hippies didn’t care about a thing in the world and lived the way they liked. It’s often said that LOVE IS BLIND and it was proved right when I just couldn’t see anything negative about them and their lifestyle and was so very thrilled about their way of living that I even asked few of my friends whether they would love to live their life , the hippie way and join me in being a hippie..some years from now. My love for the America of the 70s redefined craziness as I decorated the walls of my room with hippie slogans like “Make love, not war”, “Free Love” and Lennon’s posters and his lyrics all over. I downloaded every possible documentary that talked about that era and I was more politically aware about America than I was about my own nation. Wearing clothes as colorful as possible, painting the nails with random colours and talking about the hippies and trying to make people aware about movements like flower power, Bagism, Woodstock movement, Summer of Love, Haight-Ashbury, Vietnam War, Nixon’s hatred towards Lennon. I noticed my liking in music too had undergone a drastic change. I started listening to psychedelic music and songs like Revolution, We didn’t start the fire, Come together etc. 

Gradually the interest drifted from the political fiascos to the Hippie lifestyle which was widely dominated by the usage of drugs like Marijuana, LSD – Lysergic Acid Diethylamide and other hallucinogens. My addiction to knowing more about them grew to such an extent that my Mom was convinced that one fine morning, I would simply pack my bags and leave home to become a hippie myself. I even found out the positive effects of LSD and started vouching for it by saying that LSD enhances creativity, helps in curing Migraine and even elevates you to a different spiritual level. I found myself aloof from my real being as I had created a psychedelic world of my own. Whether it was their colorful attires that appealed me or the causes that they fought for or their definition of individual freedom, I simply have no slightest idea about it. But, certainly the Hippies and Lennon’s music was influencing me more than I thought it would. 

But, one’s roots are always too firm to be uprooted. Similarly, the culture that has been imbibed in me from my very childhood is the one that you would often see in a typical Bengali family with parents who get worried over slightest issues, a mother who points out the flaws explicitly infront of the outsiders, a father who always overlooks the faults and there’s an immense interest towards intellectual movies, books and every other thing inculcated from the very childhood. 

With such an upbringing, when I started my first year in St.Andrews, I loved the newness of everything….from my crazy bunch of classmates to the highly insane presentations but, what came to me as a culture shock was the sight of few of my classmates smoking and even indulging in drinks during breaks. It was again shocking to see that their parties were mostly the night outs with pub as a compulsory part of the get-togethers. This was highly unacceptable to me and contradicted with my values. I would rather throw a huge bong lunch at my place for all my friends than spend time with them at a night club. I would rather visit Crosswords during the free lectures than drinking beer or smoking ‘ciggies’ as they call it. When I say all these, it’s certainly not about they are incorrect or I am correct. It’s just that several such incidents made me realize how different I am in my values that I couldn’t try join them for once and I was imagining of taking drugs like the hippies. This cultural shock suddenly made me realize that it was nothing but a temporary obsession that I had of turning into a hippie for that is just not the REAL ME. The real me is nowhere close to even enquire about drugs anywhere and to lead a bohemian lifestyle. Though, the causes and their protests are still something which I honestly support and my admiration for John Lennon and his ideals is again something unchangeable but, indeed I cannot identify myself with the Hippies for my upbringing is simply different in every sense to the hippie culture. The environment I have been brought up in, my peer group, my values do not in any way match to that of the counterculture. With a few more similar culture shocks, I simply countered the counterculture of the sixties from my system. 

But, the movies like “US vs JOHN LENNON”, “THE STRAWBERRY STATEMENT”, ”HARE RAMA HARE KRISHNA”, “IMAGINE” and the documentary “LSD – THE BEYOND WITHIN!” still stirs me up from within and I tend to dream about that colorful and psychedelic era and try to imagine what would have been…if I would be a part of those campaigns and then I say to myself…. 

“I WOULD BE A BIG LOSER AND A HOPELESS FAILURE AMONG THEM FOR I AM DIFFERENT.” 

Nevertheless, my ephemeral obsession with the peace movements of the 60s and the early 70s definitely brought diversity in my music liking and added Jim Morrison, Billy Joel, The BEATLES AND MOST IMPORTANTLY JOHN LENNON to my list of all time favorites. The cultural conflict I went through in some way or the other made me broadminded though I still cannot think of defining freedom in their way in my own life. The temporary madness even made me somewhat informative about the Vietnam War and the events that took place during that period. It even gave me an insight into the world of the Beatles, John Lennon and his wife, Yoko Ono; their peace movements like Bagism, Bed Peace, Hair Peace and too many more. And, if somebody asks me today “would you want a country run by hippies?” I would proudly say 

“I would love my country to be run by politicians who support the hippie causes and refrain themselves from discriminations, wars and violence of any form!”

To conclude with, all I can think is Lennon’s words which make complete sense even in today’s progressive world…..

 “IF SOMEONE THINKS THAT LOVE AND PEACE IS A CLICHÉ THAT MUST HAVE BEEN LEFT BEHIND IN THE SIXTIES, THAT’S HIS PROBLEM. LOVE AND PEACE ARE ETERNAL.” 

Acknowledging The Heart !

When we open the door to grab the newspaper and catch our neighbor’s eyes, we instantly smile; this is nothing but a simple way of acknowledging his presence. We purchase items from the grocery store after paying the shopkeeper, we smile at him; this deed of kindness is again acknowledging the shopkeeper’s presence. The whole classroom stands up and greets the professor acknowledging her presence in the class and similarly WHEN THE TEARS ROLL DOWN OUR EYES, IT IS NOTHING BUT OUR BRAIN’S SUBTLE WAY OF ACKNOWLEDGING THE PRESENCE OF OUR HEART.

There are people who do not lock up their emotions within themselves and some are often regarded as cold stones for they hardly show their emotions. But, who should we actually blame is the million dollar question whose answer is as simple as A.B.C.

There are exactly three varieties of brains that exist in the world. Firstly, the sympathetic, compassionate and selfless brain which does not have a trace of Ego in it. This is the brain that does not envy the existence of the heart and does not even mind giving the heart its due credit. I know the adjectives ‘compassionate’ and ‘selfless’ are too subjective to describe the biological unit of Brain, but after all our brain is also a part of body and a close associate of our heart. Neither can function without each other and hence, these qualities indeed do justice while explaining the Brain’s mettle. The altruistic brain cares not about who is around and what will the world think. It is kind enough to acknowledge the eternal company of the heart at any place and at any time. Though a large section of the world’s population consider it to be too cheesy and dislike such a benevolent brain, but a person with such a brain spares his heart a lot of pains as it does not hold back the emotions which suffocate the heart and gradually choke the throat. Every individual who has a selfish brain does go through the pain of not being able to be as expressive as he or she would have wanted to.

After the big-hearted brain, comes the ultimate example of hypocrisy. No person can ever be a worse hypocrite than this type of a Brain. This is the one which acknowledges the heart secretly when nobody is watching. As the world is considered to be full of hypocrites, even in the world of Brains, this is the most widely found brain. For some enormous unknown reason, this kind of brain feels ashamed to acclaim the heart’s presence in public and considers this act as an act of chivalry and is very proud to think this way too. This type of brain is mostly found in the population that hails from Mars.

Lastly arrives, the ever-confused brain which suffers from some neurotic syndrome because this brain is aware of its folly of holding back the emotions and not acknowledging the heart and indeed feels terrible about it. Though, the hearts that belong to such brains tend to fight back and at unexpected moments, forcibly earn the acknowledgment from the brain. This undeniably leaves the thinking section of our body shell-shocked, speechless and clueless. These brains are not as ruthless as the hypocritical brains because these do not have a very strong command over their hearts and they haven’t permanently chained their hearts too. They themselves are disturbed over their behavior and never support it either. These are the helpless lot of the three types.

Personally, I have not been blessed with the generous brain. Circumstances have proved that the Brain that resides in me is the perplexed one which very rarely remembers its companion, My Heart. But, nevertheless, My Heart has on certain occasions stood up for itself and has even left me teary eyed not just in a confined room but in front of others too. I have reprimanded my Brain to change its ways but, it acts in a manner which is too stubborn and hence, I have ordered my Heart, not to stay quiet for long but to fight back whenever things get too tough. 
To wind up this post, I would love to say that EVERY HEART FEELS, IT’S JUST HOW MUCH CONTROL OUR HEARTS HAVE OVER OUR BRAINS IS WHAT MAKES THE DIFFERENCE IN THE EYES OF THE WORLD.

I Certainly Hate You !

'I HATE YOU !'

People often treasure SMSes which are very close to their hearts. Similarly, this post is dedicated to my Best Friend who has promised to treasure the SMS that I sent him a few weeks back saying 'I HATE YOU !' forever. This post was supposed to be out a few years later but, Fate can never get rid of its habit of bringing highly unexpected twists to me every now and then, so here I am writing for the most irritating friend of mine who knows exactly how I feel at any given point in time.

A couple of years back, we cursed our luck for not having met earlier and an year back, we happily retorted that the delayed meeting was to be compensated now with two years of togetherness. But, none of us knew the two years were never meant to be.

When my place would be changed because of his excessive comments during the lectures, I would get angry with him; when he would continuously tease me and link me up with every random guy, I would give him disgusted looks; when I would try to concentrate on the lecture and he would keep on hitting me, I would be highly irked; but I never could contemplate my college days without all these. At times, I would seriously threaten him that I will not sit next to him anymore but those were mere words, never uttered seriously.

When he asked me to pray for him, he says he himself didn't know for what reason he had asked me to pray. Nevertheless, the next evening he tells me that he detests to cause grief to his few special friends and yet he couldn't delay in giving me the news that has left him with mixed feelings and emotions beyond comprehension. It was one such news that made me fly without wings to see my best friend get what he always wished for. It was one such news that meant I would not get to see him everyday anymore and yet made me feel delighted and ecstatic. He got through the interview in the college he always dreamt to be in and amidst of all the happiness, it left both of us upset for quite a few reasons.

We suddenly realized that we need to finally make some new friends because till date, we never felt the need of another friend as long as we both gave each other company. Immediately I started imagining my Andrean life without his comments, his taunts and nevertheless his care and thoughtfulness. All of a sudden, the innumerable moments we spent together preparing presentations and projects crowded my mind. He was, for the first time in life, scared that he will have to enter an alien classroom with too many faces giving him various queer expressions; to enter a place where everybody knew each other while he was alone knowing none of them there.
But, he certainly forgot the most important thing.....that he is really quick at making friends and adjusting to any given surrounding. People cannot avoid him and they definitely feel bad detesting him and hence, hey my irritating buddy! wear your 'enigmatic' smile, march towards the classroom and shine brightly like the Sun...afterall, you are the 'SUNSHINE' and you know it, don't you?

Lastly, My Irksome Best Friend, your 'Sangad ka Asar' has indeed changed me for the good, in too many ways and I do not know who will bear my nonsensical talks about Astrology during literature lectures and I do not know in whose ears will I shout early in the morning...'Ghum Pachhe'. Honestly, just like you, even I am wondering who will be my partner now; I do not know who will be my team partner for any of the team events; I have no idea who will remind me to collect the notes before the exams and I simply am clueless as to who will help me during the presentations when none of my team members move a single muscle of theirs. But, nevertheless, we both knew this day had to come if not now, an year later when you would head on towards your dream of becoming the sports journalist and reporting straight from OLD TRAFFORD and I would stay here with Advertising and the Camera in my hands. So, lets leave the upsetting factor behind and make our lives more adventurous and exciting with new friends around. Though, am sure I will never have another Best Friend like you and I hope you do not find another Arundhati in your new college, who will bore you all day long, chattering incessantly.

To conclude with, you have always called me the Ditcher whenever I left you online and went back to my work without informing but this time, you are the real Ditcher and am happy that you have ditched me as it gives me a chance to get free passes for Blitzkrieg and to proclaim that my Best buddy is the best student in KC!

Never forget..I STILL HATE YOU BIGTIME and now you can treasure this token of best wishes forever with a lot of Hatred included which I know you do not mind when it comes from me. Cheers to you and always remember, this has happened for the best, though a bit sooner than it was expected, still, it's going to pave the perfect path for you.

SEALED WITH BEST WISHES AND LOTS OF LOVE COVERED WITH IMMENSE HATRED,
Your genuine and crazy friend,
Shuto.

Comprehending Emotions !

The ladies chatter and the men murmur,
The children are into their dreamy slumber...

Everything is right in their place,
While all alone, I simply star-gaze!

Thy silent smile holds a barrel of tears,
Where shall I...Empty my fears??

Like the thunders we hear in the sorrow of the cloud...
I don't want to express myself so loud..!

Is there anybody to comprehend my emotions?
For I am left with no more confessions..!

The woods are growing old, soon they'll fall...
Me too am finding tough to stand tall!

When you slammed the door, the door behind me closed...
That was the moment all my joys left me...when I needed them the most!

Insecurity - Thanks to Technology !

Ever wondered how your best friend broke up few weeks back with her Prince Charming and stated the cause being ignorance on his part? Ever noticed how paranoid you tend to feel when you try reaching that one person and you cannot get through their line? All the negative thoughts immediately begin to fill up your mind. Ever thought how your assignments end up being incomplete because you are busy chatting with your friends about the latest SAIF-INA gossip? Ever pondered how updating your Facebook status and tweeting becomes an urgent need while you are on the move? Ahh! The parents usually blame our generation for our compulsive ways but, in reality, it’s the technological advancement and how easily accessible these means have become to us is what is contributing to such circumstances.

I mean why don’t we look back a few decades? There was no internet facility available at the households. Cellular phones were alien objects. Social networking was something unimaginable for everybody. That was the era of letters. And, guys! If you feel, there was no romance then, you are absolutely mistaken. The hearts were connected and definitely the bonds were stronger than they are today. The reason the couples panic today is mostly because he or she didn’t reply to my SMS. He or she didn’t pick up my call. There’s a lack of understanding and this is all thanks to the technological progress. With every SMS going unanswered, with every call going unattended, the sense of betrayal deepens. People have stopped connecting via hearts. It’s all so technical. So, scientific development ought to be blamed for the rapid rise in the number of break ups.

Now, comes the issue of increasing over protectiveness. Didn’t trains run late a few decades back? Was there never any sort of water logging during the monsoons? Was there never any urgent work in the offices which demanded more number of hours from the employees? People would never go crazy because of these reasons back then. But, today, the scenario is completely different. Almost every teenager has a cell phone and they are shot with numerous questions as soon as they reach home late. This is because the parents cannot imagine that the batteries can ever get exhausted and they tend to think all the negative consequences for the child reaching home late. Was there never a day during the eighties and the nineties when the child reached home late? The parents would never shoot questions like bullets at them regarding their whereabouts but, today this does happen and again technology is to be blamed for this.

The last and the worst consequence is the Space. Today, every individual feels the need for space and space for them means an escape to the virtual world. A child returns from school and instead of talking to his parents, he would rather sit in front of the PC chatting with strangers, who indeed appear to be friendly, but who knows the ultimate motive? A working woman comes home after a hard day at office and instead of spending some quiet hours with her better half, wishes to gets her own space and to think of a new Facebook status. If technology creates space for all of us this way, then that day is not too far when there will be nothing at all but space amidst the individuals staying under the same roof. More than connecting people, technology is distancing them with the real world and in a way, giving rise to insecurities where the level of understanding is evaporating and soon might even vanish without leaving a trace.

Personally, being a not very serious victim of this socio-technological hazard, I feel the sooner the realization dawns on us, the better it is because this is neither a fatal disease nor is it beyond repair. A strict check on ourselves and this addiction is very much curable. So, live your life the healthy way... Don't let Technology Control You...rather Learn to Control TECHNOLOGY !

‘SERENDIPITY’ - Ordinary yet Amusing!

After the disastrous failure of ‘Town and Country’, director Peter Chelsom bounces back with a lot of sensitivity and a little bit of sensibility with the enjoyable rom-com, ‘Serendipity’. It definitely does not make you laugh your hearts out but does have the power to make you stick to it till the very end and leaves a pretty long hangover too. The movie makes your heart think and your mind feel!

Christmas is the time when folks expect miracles to happen and forces of nature to act together in order to attract happiness into their lives. Similiarly, one such winter night, Jonathan (John Cussack) and Sara (Kate Beckinsale) crossed their paths; spent a couple of hours together and a connection was formed; truly eternal in nature. Jon knew he found the love of his life while Sara believes that nothing happens accidentally unless Fate conspires. Hence, to be sure whether they are meant to be together, she plans a test. Unfortunately, Fate disappoints both of them as the Test ends on a failure and they set out on their own separate paths. 

Hang on! They do exchange their numbers. Jon writes his number on a 5$ bill while Sara writes her number inside one of her novels. But, they both send out these objects into the Universe and hope the Universe brings them back together someday.

 Ahead few years, Jonathan and Sara are remotely close to each other and both of them are all set to walk down the aisles with individuals, who they do not think are their soul mates. Both of them, unhappy down their hearts set out to find each other and begins the twists and turns which ultimately unites them.

Like every other romantic comedy, Serendipity too does not demand you to use your brains and to analyze the events. John Cussack with his charming looks will appeal almost everybody on the other side of the screen while Kate Beckinsale does not over do her expressions at any point of the movie. The story line may not unpredictable, yet the performances are commendable enough to label this flick as one of the most watchable romantic comedies for hearty laughs. Molly Shannon and Jeremy Piven justify their roles as Kate and John’s best buddies without any bit of superficiality.

The movie does promise a gentle sigh of relief at the closing scene when the couple unite finally after way too many ‘almost met’ situations. Nevertheless, at some or the other point, the movie even makes you believe that we are mere puppets and we move as the Universe wants us to move. ‘Serendipity’ brings to you an out and out entertaining as well as a memorable tale of two lovers searching each other in the milling crowd of millions. So folks! do not wait for any ‘Fateful Accident’ to bring you across this movie. Instead, go and look out for ‘Serendipity’ and gift yourself and people close to you, a delightful movie experience.