This is perhaps one of the very few posts I have written relying completely on my personal experiences.
'Estrangement', 'Alienation', 'Distance', 'Separation'
These do not form the basis of what follows but, plays an essentially important role in what lies ahead.
So, feel free to get connected to it, you may argue against it and one has all the rights to rubbish it off but, at the end of the day, it stays as true and genuine for me as we see the sun rise and set every dawn and dusk.
How often have we confined our deepest thoughts and feelings in our hearts waiting for that one beck that instantaneously prompts us to unveil it all at once? How often do we keep on enduring pains for the ones close to us? That’s something which can never earn a universal conviction hence, let that be aside.
After going through pains for long, one cannot deny the formal feeling that sets in and there’s always a lot to say even when we proclaim, ‘I have nothing more to say to you!’ and it all stays bottled up until that one moment when the memories from your past come gushing into your present and flood your vision as moments keep flashing by your eyes and render them all misty.
And, that is the hour when one cannot hold back the tears anymore; the words seem to flow like the pious river stream with nothing but the truth.
For me, it took just two lines and everything came back to me and suddenly the perpetual estrangement seemed to vanish into thin air, wetting my eyes out of nowhere.
For months, what stayed unspoken and untold, all the thoughts that were always a part of me and remained only with me found all the right words at the right time. Perhaps, it was the cathartic moment for me that proved ‘love’ and ‘pain’ goes hand in hand and one can never bear the insurmountable amount of pain unless the love is equally intense.
Ever since that evening, memories of all sorts have often hit me at strange hours and they have catapulted me over and over again between various time periods. After being captured by a strong feeling of nostalgia, as I write this out, there is only one thing which I am sure of.
I know...even after weeks, months, years, decades, the pains will reside in harmony with love, inseparable, next to each other, enclosed within the boundaries of the ever-suffering heart.