An Emotional release or an Accumulation ?

“O hateful error, melancholy's child, 
    Why dost thou show to the apt thoughts of men 
    The things that are not? O error, soon conceived, 
    Thou never comest unto a happy birth, 
    But kill'st the mother that engender'd thee!”

During my schooldays, I paraphrased these lines from ‘Julius Caesar’ over and over again but I recently felt connected to these lines over some of the recent dismaying turn of events. From the play’s point of view, these lines talk about how Cassius resigns to his fate, tries to fight on but ultimately surrenders and ends his life’s journey. But the movie, ‘The Lake House’ made me connect to these lines from a drastically different point of view.  

Ever noticed how we enjoy romantic comedy films on the absolutely carefree days and spend long hours watching back to back films from the drama genre specially the ones which have tragic endings. This particular behavior is not restricted to movies itself. Even our reading tastes consistently complement to our moods. Your days are sunny and you are reading Cecelia Ahern’s ‘The Gift’, Chetan Bhagat’s ‘Five Point Someone’, Sidney Sheldon’s ‘Tell Me Your Dreams’ and as soon as you are surrounded by gloomy blues, you start shifting your reading preferences towards classics like Jane Austen’s ‘Persuasion’, Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s ‘Love in the time of cholera’, Erich Segal’s ‘Love Story’, Danielle Steel’s ‘Heartbeat’ and so on and so forth. Now, the ones who stay away from books are no exceptions. Their musical tastes go hand in hand with their mood swings. From the songs of ‘Red Hot Chilli Peppers’, suddenly the playlist gets loaded with John Denver’s classic tracks.

Before I proceed with the post further, let me paraphrase these lines the way I connect to them. All our mistakes can be considered as the children of our sad thoughts. These very thoughts blind us completely and messes up with our reality in colossal ways. Ultimately, instead of relieving us from grief, it attracts more sadness and negativity into our lives.

Sounds confusing, isn’t it? Indeed it is!

Now, just think when we are feeling terribly low and depressed, why are we immediately inclined towards listening to sad songs or why do we like watching movies wherein the protagonists suffer at the end?

 This reminds me of Percy Bysshe Shelley’s famous quote,

 “Our sweetest songs are those that tell of saddest thoughts”.

Very much true! These fictional characters and sad songs make us connect to them and we feel we are not alone living with pains. For some time, we consider them as some emotional healers and term them as the perfect escape. But, in reality, these movies and books paint our lives with deeper blues during the already blue phases and thus, instead of acting as an emotional release or an outlet, ends up accumulating more and more melancholy in our hearts. So, why do we still let our thoughts be the final decision makers? Let your spirit rise. The blues will indeed make you feel low, desolated and take you away from reality but, it is in your hands to make the final verdict. 

Don’t indulge in any of these forms of literature because literature is more powerful than you think it is. It can take you to cloud # 9 and in the next second instantly make you fall on ground from that height without any parachute and then, you know, where you land, right? The ultimate ‘Land of Despair’. Save yourself from the land of despair and keep yourself engaged with everything entertaining and no serious stuff and see your blues lighten and how magically your mood too brightens.

Cheers!

To Do Or Not To Do ?

“To be, or not to be: that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd.” 

Here are some of the best lines from the Bard of Avon’s nib, Hamlet’s soliloquy. In the above context, Prince Hamlet is extremely unsure of himself and often wavers between the two extremes – life’ and ‘death’

But, I am neither going to talk about Shakespeare’s greatness nor glorify Hamlet’s decision here. In fact, after reading these lines more than once, I realized there dwells a fundamental actuality which almost everybody experiences in their everyday lives. This is the most confusing sort of fear which can empower your thoughts for more than you can ever imagine. Even though our minds may not necessarily oscillate between the extremes of life and death, we often find ourselves in an unwanted state of fickleness which is usually capricious. Now, for the ones who have already started falsely convincing themselves that they never land up in such moments of obscure bemusement, here are some simple instances from our everyday happenings.

Don’t you ever decide to text anybody and go till the extent of even framing the entire message and just when you are about to add the recipient’s number, you hear a faint little voice within you asking you to stop; gradually the faint voice tends to yell at you and you immediately delete the whole text? In this case, it’s the simple fear of the reply or maybe the fear of no reply is something that impels you to question yourself – TO SEND OR NOT TO SEND?

Often we receive invitations for parties and we are all excited to attend the party and at the twelfth hour, it suddenly strikes that there is going to be that one person whose presence makes you feel uncomfortable and after a while, you not too gladly decide to miss the party. 

Here, TO GO OR NOT TO GO is the ultimate million dollar question.

The most common instance of vacillation is when we reluctantly eat up our words when they are at the tip of our tongues. The thought often pops up – TO SAY OR NOT TO SAY? We indeed face such moments every now and then, don’t we?

Now, the supreme question is 

“WHERE DOES THIS INDEFINABLE CONFUSION STEM FROM?” 

Is it our fear of confronting or our fear of losing an integral part of our existence? Ultimately, it is a vicious circle that has no definite end whatsoever. Especially, even after making the decision at the end of the conflicting thoughts, we still keep wondering as to why we made that very decision and why not otherwise. In all the above instances that I mentioned, our lack of decisiveness is very much visible.

In the case of sending the msg, we ultimately are afraid of the repercussion but we never realize that our not sending the msg might widen the gap which tends to becomes unbridgeable on the longer run. So, in the end, the loss is unavoidable so why fear at the first place?

Now, coming to the second example, we miss the party in order to avoid the uncomfortable feeling we would feel in that SINGLE person’s presence. But, we tend to forget that we miss all the other giggles and laughter in the bargain. Why entertain the not so important EGO and lose all the fun? Why give one SINGLE person so much of importance especially when they make you feel nothing but uncomfortable? But, again, we generally tend to avoid the rest of the group and focus only on that not at all important person.

Finally, coming to the last and the most common confusion – TO SAY OR NOT TO SAY? Don’t know about anybody else, but I personally experience this every single day on various occasions. If I do not agree with some statement, it is not always possible for me to say it out aloud though I may be dying to shoot my point of view. Why don’t I exercise my freedom of speech? Oh no! Do I even have it? But, this is again an inexplicable fear which creates a chaotic situation within my thoughts and at the end of the day; I decide to keep the words to myself. This may lead to unexpected consequences but saying them aloud too might not be very pleasant, will they?

This is not at all any ailment which can be cured with the help of medicines but it is indeed a never ending conflicting situation which we have to live with till the day we fall asleep forever. We cannot run away from these clashes; neither can we hide from them or escape them. All we can do is face them with a brave heart, make the decision that your heart prompts you to make and leave the rest on the SUPREME POWER that governs us all.

Peace!

20 years...summed up!

“LIVE EVERYDAY AS YOUR LAST BECAUSE ONE OF THESE DAYS, IT WILL BE!”

-          LIFE OR SOMETHING LIKE IT.

The movie “Life or Something Like It” truly didn’t have anything out of the box to offer but, it did succeed in attracting positive energy towards my otherwise negatively mundane and awkwardly silent evening. Nevertheless, the movie motivated me towards writing this post. This write up is absolutely a random one and I do not find anything negative about it because I do not find any reason in running away from something that is bound to happen.

‘Nobody is Immortal’ and death will find you some day for sure. You cannot escape death; neither can you hide from death, when it paves its majestic way into your life.

After living for almost a score of years, when I retrospect now, I see vivid moments of uncontrollable laughter – I must say those incessant giggles did earn me a commendable share of troubles too, but who cares?!? At the end, I was just consuming the best medicine, isn't it? I never forget… "LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE”. Along with those heehaws, there are tears too, caused by immense grief, sadness and guilt. There are times when I have been unethical and there have been instances when I have diligently followed the rules, no matter what. There have been days brighter than sapphire and even too many hours darker than pitch black. I have often been regarded as the most cheerful person around; while on many occasions, I have pretended to be the strong person who I was not. So, there’s already a huge bag full of memorable experiences and there will be too many more I hope.

But, why am I writing this post?

Ah! After watching the movie when I came across this hilarious epitaph co-incidentally in some random Facebook album, I thought what if my last breath arrives sooner than I expect it to knock and that too without any prior notice? Obviously I will not be able to bury my head in the sand then but why not prepare an Epitaph beforehand only? Now, generally an epitaph is a simple quotation on any gravestone for the person’s soul residing inside the grave. But, I will never be able to sum up my life in just one statement; maybe others will be able to. So, my epitaph will be directly proportional to the amount I talk.

Hence, instead of just one line, here are a few lines that I would love to see on my Epitaph:

“You will be eternally remembered for your love that was limitless; smile that was constant; laughter that was contagious; talks that were endless; arguments that were baseless; acts that were hilariously careless; silence that was never heard; memory that was incredibly sharp; jokes that were terribly lame; hurts that were dejectedly irreversible; madness that was beyond comparison and nevertheless the shrill and distinct pitch which was never inaudible.”

Now, this I guess sums up my life perfectly as of now. Ten years ahead, there may be some additions or subtractions. Who knows? Because in any case, I cannot predict the future, can I?

P.S: The word ‘eternally’ is extremely essential for my epitaph. After all, I doubt there is anybody who wishes not to be ever remembered and I am not an exception.